1. |
where do i begin?
03:56
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i came into this world
with nothing else
but my life to give
...and if i have to die
then i have to live the way
i wanna live
and no one can give me
the wrong answer now
and nobody's there
with a smile
and i sign on their chest
that says "ask me how"
and it's too late
to get what i deserve
i always wanted to ask
and i've finally finally
worked up the nerve
why couldn't you
show me the way?
why didn't you
say all the things
that i needed you to say?
why couldn't you be here today?
to stay
in support of me
to stay
like a fort for me
to stay
i'd love to see you....
stay away from me
you're the last thing i need
now that everything has changed
...and it's much clearer now
now that you're finally
drifting out of range.
and you shouldn't known
that i couldn't forget.
i had to become a man
you didn't have to have so much to regret.
it's hard to believe
you even gave me my name.
it's all i got from you,
except questions,
so i'll ask again...
why couldn't you
notice the way that i watched you for so long
why couldn't you
let some other poor bastard sing this song
why couldn't you
be strong?
...and i'm gone.
...guess i shouldn't have children,
or it'll go on
...and it shouldn't.
i shouldn't be like you.
but i am.
...i am.
am i friend or foe?
it's the end,
but i still don't know where i
begin
to heal myself
begin
to feel myself
begin
to find out who i am
somebody tell me...
where do i begin?
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2. |
nothing
03:23
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thank you
for all the things you gave me
all the work you saved me
thank you for all the sins you forgave of me
i never felt so well controlled
i couldn't tell if i'd been sold
or if the seller had only told me so
i'd like to find another way
i'd like to ask you if you may
is it o.k.?
shit, i don't know how to do it anyway
but thank you
for making me so greatfull
so sarcastic
and so hateful
i'll be forever faithful
to your cause
thank you for nothing
nothing
thank you for nothing
nothing
thank you for nothing
nothing
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3. |
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what am i supposed to do?
i guess you don't know
i wanna be alone
if i can't be with you
let me go home
if we're really through
and if you ever know what you wanted from me
i you ever have a clue
let me know
what was i supposed to do?
how am i supposed to feel?
i guess it's too late
i always hesitated
i guess i don't deserve a voice
it comes with a choice
and i just don't know what to say
hurting you
is all i seem to do
i can always make you cry
i don't even have to try
it hurts me too
maybe not as much as you
but that's something i can't help
cause i need to hurt myself
anything else you'd like to try?
i don't see why not
since i don't wanna say goodbye to you
please don't give up
that's not what i really want
if you can't beat me
i can't win
let me in
and tell me what to do
what am i supposed to do?
what am i supposed to do?
what am i supposed to do?
what am i supposed to do?
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4. |
on and on
03:19
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this life isn't fit for us
and this life is not my dream
is falling down the only thing that proves this?
and is getting up as useless as it seems?
as a child i had not yet learned to hate
and as a man i have forgotten love
and chasing dreams has made life complicated
and now the simple things are all i'm dreaming of
sensitive pepoel are turned crazy or cold
and we wonder why they can't communicate
some people wind up dead before they've grown old
and they'll wonder where the time went
but it'll be too late
they hate you if you're clever
and they despise you if you're a fool
it's no wonder kids thing fucked up rock and roll stars
who are proud of being fucked up are so cool
sometimes i feel like no one here believes me
yeah i wonder if they even hear a word i say
to have someone make clear what's above me
yeah to hear them speak there's not a thing i wouldn't pay
i never thought
that this life could be so long
but i guess i was wrong
as my time here lingers on
and on
and on
and on
and on
and on
and on
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5. |
the damn
03:06
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oh god kill me
if i ever get over you
i never asked for this
and now i can't stand anything else
take me away from here
help me get away from myself
i never loved so much
you're my crutch
and i'll never let you go
plug a hole
but the water keeps drilling
before you know it there's another one
plaster cracks and the layers keep peeling
never stop till the work is never done
water's rushing crashing shaking
everything's come apart in your hands
you can't stop it now
it's breaking
screaming
praying
out of the way
and
heal me
feel me
let me go
i never felt so low
till i knew how wrong it was to be high
high
a city now lies in ruin
only i can tell the tale
of how we loved and laughed, and lost
and failed
and failed
and failed
failed
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6. |
i
05:29
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i've fallen down before
and i kind of like it on the floor
and i'm crawling out that door
and i can't hear you anymore
and i'd like to fall in love
and i've had enough
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7. |
a lot to learn
03:53
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i didn't ever wanna alienate you
you couldn't make it past my wall
and now i miss you
i was a fool to let friendships be discarded
i thought i was too cool
but i was too retarded
how could i be so blind
and what's wrong with my mind?
i never thought that i'd be even less than typical
but i keep getting burned
for speaking out of turn
i wanna show what i know even though
i have a lot to learn
and even you were starting to dis me
and even you were starting to dis me
and even you were starting to dis me
it makes me feel so sick
that i get such a kick
out of being the one that they talk about
but i love to hear my name
my ego takes the blame
i always get a return on what i earn
but i have a lot to learn
i wanna say something
before it's all forgotten
but that part of me and you seems to have grown so rotten
i can't say i ever really understood you
i now know a little more than i then knew about what not to do
i know now i was wrong
but now isn't very long
will i still hate myself in the morning
change isn't always good
but something tells me that i should
so it's a brand new james that i'm forming
you gave me this guitar
made me feel like a star
and if experience really makes us who we are
i hope this one takes me far
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8. |
hole to feed
04:32
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be my mother
be my son
be my father
swallow my cum
tell me you love me
make it real
give me a piece of yourself
to replace the feelings i no longer feel
i'm on top of the situation
i'm gonna get what i'm not supposed to need
i can't stop till i reach a new sensation
they say i'm sick
but i've got a hole to feed
you think you know me
think again
go on and show me
how it feels to be the places i have been
i didn't get the things that you got
you haven't fought the way
that i have fought
i'm on top of the situation
i'm gonna get what i'm not supposed to need
i can't stop till i reach my destination
i hope it's good
cuz i got a hole to feed
there's a hole in my sole
that i don't control in thought or in deed
like a hole in my skin
it doesn't take long before it begins to bleed
bleeding hearts and artists
try to fill up empty spaces
with their pain
but once a hole is there
it's there forever empty
fucking with your brain
if you can figure out what people want you to do
then do it just to get some mental health
if you believe that someone understands you
you probably don't understand yourself
i'm beginning to think that all i need is to never be satisfied
i'm beginning to think that all i need is to never be satisfied
i'm beginning to think that all i need is to never be satisfied
i'm beginning to think that all i need is to never be satisfied
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9. |
messages
03:35
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hi
i'm not here to answer your call right now
but leave a message and
i'll get back to you as soon as possible
thank you for calling
have a nice day
hi
i'm not here to answer your call right now
but leave a message and
i'll get back to you as soon as possible
thank you for calling
have a nice day
some people
have something to say
they don't say anything
they're afraid
that they'll say it wrong
so they keep it to themselves
other people listen
all the time
but they don't hear
what they want to hear
they feel alone
and they are
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Level Records Los Angeles, California
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